


Fools Gold

by Origingirl



Series: Diamonds are Gems, Too. [5]
Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Abuse, Emotional Manipulation, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-29
Updated: 2018-08-29
Packaged: 2019-07-04 08:48:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15837852
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Origingirl/pseuds/Origingirl
Summary: They'll all see. She'll get away at any cost.





	Fools Gold

As she sat alone in her room, rage, fear, and sorrow pricked at the centre of her gem like needles. Her eyes darted to the bubble decorations she had once adored but slowly came to hate over time. The once bright colors lining her walls seemed to have faded to ugly, dull magenta and yucky mustard hues. Every sense always became heightened in this state.

Yes.

It wasn't the first time.

The first time, she almost poofed from disbelief more than fear. She hadn’t been able to believe that White could be so awfully wretched.

It was just a question, she told herself at first. 

Granted, Yellow and Blue’s words of caution had made her slightly weary of the Diamond who topped their worlds’ insignia. However, when talking with her one on one, White’s voice had never held anything akin to malice. 

Until she’d actually asked.

It was only a few thousand years after Pink had emerged. She was indeed considered young but far from incapable. White had loved that about her. She’d even encourage it. Pink couldn’t count the amount of times when White would spare a moment to tell her stories about the vast universe beyond Homeworld, riddled with untapped resources and incomprehensible possibilities. Given this, Pink thought White would be happy that she’d expressed interest in wanting to venture out to the cosmos. She thought White would smile at her with joy and encourage her even more, as she’d always done.

And she had smiled.

It was a smile that had shaken Pink to the very core of her being. A thin, imaginary sheen of ice had begun to infect her gem’s edges, freezing her, rendering her incapable of moving just an inch, let alone escaping White’s piercing gaze.

She’d spoken then, and Pink had never imagined her otherwise lovely, sing-song voice could convey threats as easily as love and adoration. It had made every encounter with White since then a facade - an insincere bout of plain words void of all emotion.

White had loomed over Pink. With the tip of her dangerously sharp finger, she traced the rim of Pink’s gem. The thin sheen of ice had grown immensely thick, enveloping all of her. 

When Pink had asked, Blue had been the one to tell her what it meant when a gem was shattered. The elder Diamond had told her that everything a gem knew, loved, feared, and loathed all froze… and then vanished, each part of that gem separating. Apart. Isolated. Gone. Forever. 

The way White had run her finger around and then across Pink’s own gem… it was crooked and inconsistent, like the way a crack in the floor would look. Like the way a crack in a gem would look.

The room had begun vibrating, and all of her senses faded away. She had regained them, only to find herself in her room. Slowly coming to, she had tried to remember the words White had spoken to her that, at the time, were blocked out by the horrible cold Pink felt encase her gem. She couldn’t in the end. She did remember the question, and whatever White had said to her, she assumed it was along the lines of never hoping to leave Homeworld or asking about it ever again.

The second time was a rather close call.

Pink had her suspicions about White being ‘different’ by then. She’d crossed paths with her in one of the main hallways at Homeworld’s center point. White had strode all but two large steps past her when Pink had heard her heels cease clicking across the floor. Dread consumed Pink’s mind as she slowly turned to see White’s back facing her. Although she hadn’t been able to see her face, Pink had known she wore the same smile.

“Come here, Starlight.” She’d said.

Without any other option, Pink had obliged, knowing running would only make her appear a coward of a Diamond - something she’d never let White see her as.

“It’s so lovely that you and Blue are so close.” White had said.

Pink had eventually gotten to where she was standing in front of White’s large form. Her eyes had been closed in contentment, as if Pink hadn’t been there at all - as if she had been reminiscing to herself. This had done nothing short of enrage Pink. Since all forms of sincerity had drained from White’s voice, the way she’d speak fondly of her only sought to annoy Pink at the best of times.

“I love Blue. Why wouldn’t we be close?”

White had huffed a sickeningly sweet laugh, her eyelids lifting slightly, just enough that Pink could make out their bright, diamond-shaped pupils.

“And how comforting that is to know,” White had said before kneeling down in front of Pink, much to the smaller Diamond’s surprise, “that you have someone besides myself to confide in.”

Pink had felt herself still. The way White had put emphasis on the words ‘confide in’ unnerved her.

“I do confide in her.” Pink had stood her ground, as meek as she felt whenever in White’s presence. “She cares about me - about my feelings and thoughts and hopes.”

Pink had finished, allowing herself to feel an inkling of confidence, which had been washed away before she could relish in it. White’s smile - that awful, awful smile - had grown, and it was then Pink had known she’d said too much. The fear from that alone had frozen her before White’s fingertip even touched her gem.

“And what exactly is it you hope for, my brightness?” White had asked, tracing those uneven patterns across the surface of Pink’s gem, her voice a hoax of adoration.

It was then Pink had to be careful, lest she wished to blackout like the first time. As much as she wanted to snap White’s finger in half, she had to brave that scenario if she wished to remain in White’s good graces - if she wanted to make White believe she was completely helpless under her condescension. Mustering all her will power in a single gesture, Pink had brought her hand up to the top of White’s finger and gently placed it there. White had stopped her tracing - her expression overcome with one of awe as if she was watching an amusing performance. Silence had stretched over them as Pink selected her words to answer.

“I hope that… I want to be the best Diamond I can be.” She remembers saying, eyes turned downward.

White had slowly moved her fingertip to turn Pink’s chin upward, matching their gazes. White’s expression had been unreadable, which Pink actually hated more than her smile. At least when White was smiling, Pink knew her intentions. But then, she could only stand and wait.

“You will, Pink.” White had said, lightly caressing the side of Pink’s face. 

Pink’s brows furrowed. She could count on one hand the times White had referred to her with her actual name as opposed to ‘Starlight’ or ‘My Brightness’. It had only served to unnerve her further, though the frozen feeling was gone by then.

White had stood, gave her a wave goodbye, and resumed walking to whatever destination she was off to.

Although for the most part, Pink had succeeded in standing her ground, but the sudden emptiness she’d experienced immediately following didn’t feel much better. It was like when White had walked off, she walked away with a small piece of Pink in her grasp. Like she had taken a part of her without physically doing so. Never before had she felt such a potent mixture of confusion, tiredness, and dread all at once. Feeling physically incapable of being able to walk much further, Pink had summoned her palanquin that took her back to her room. 

Her room… this awful place was where she found herself yet again.

All color drained from her surroundings by now, leaving Pink to rock herself gently back and forth - a motion she found a small amount of comfort in. The last time, she’d remained in her room for… gosh, she couldn’t remember. It was enough time to have Blue come fetch her.

When Pink found herself wrapped in Blue’s embrace, the silence in her room was no longer one to fear. It became infused with a loving aura so strong that Pink considered allowing herself to cry. She would not however. She would never give White that satisfaction. Blue knew all too well how ‘different’ White could be and sought to comfort Pink the best she could. She knew Pink was basically fresh out of the ground in Diamond years and had yet to acclimate to White’s strong personality… If a personality even existed there at all, Pink thought.

“Oh, Pink.” She’d speak softly, clutching the smaller Diamond against her own. “I know it’s difficult sometimes. Believe me, I do. White is different, but she means well deep down.”

‘How incredibly, terribly, awfully wrong you are, Blue,’ Pink so desperately wished to say. It was evident that Pink was different from the three other Diamonds, which evoked a sense of disregard in Yellow and Blue, as pure as their intentions with her were. A mere child, whos wants were invalidated compared to the bigger picture Homeworld strove for.

She knew she couldn’t even hope to truly tell them. It would be admitting to defeat when she looked into White’s eyes - something she just. Wouldn’t. Do. Ever. She refused. If White wished to treat her like a puppet, Pink would tug on those strings until they gave and she was free.

Soon.

The thought occurred to her then in Blues arms. She loved the other Diamond and Yellow - stern as she may be. She loved her fellow gems, but… it wasn’t what she needed. 

It was these thoughts that raced through her mind after her latest episode, when White had held Pink at her fingertip for such a long time, she thought she’d never escape or hear the end of it. And as much as Pink tried to hold her own like she’d done in their second encounter, Pink had felt the icy darkness consume her for the second time in her life, awakening in her room yet again.

She’d told White - told her that she wanted to be the best Diamond she can be. How was she supposed to achieve that while stuck on Homeworld? How could she call herself a Diamond if she wasn’t free to spread her own influence via colonies across the stars?

Perhaps it was a matter of age? But… Blue and Yellow both acclimated within the first thousand years, and both of them had ventured out to create their own colonies thereafter. Pink was sure by now that she was nothing more than a pretty pink accessory to White. Like a pearl, but with a much more significant gem. Something to love and adore inside a pretty pink box of a room. 

Curled up in her room, tired and frustrated, a thought occurred to Pink. She’d never asked Blue or Yellow if White had treated them the same way. Sure, they’d gotten their own freedom to go out and colonize, but that didn’t mean White hadn’t treated them as she’d been treating Pink. Maybe that’s why they were so reluctant? Because Pink knew all too well how it felt to be at the mercy of White’s literal fingertips. It evoked fear like no other. If Blue and Yellow had suffered the same treatment at one point, who’s to say they weren’t simply afraid to confront her even now? 

Pink wouldn’t blame either of them, but… she highly doubted it. Again, Pink was sure that because of her own unique ‘difference’ in being a Diamond, Yellow and Blue disregarded her worries in a way, even if they didn’t actively mean to do so. They probably just thought she’d been overreacting the entire time.

Pink felt her eyes grow heavy as the weight of all her thoughts dropped onto her body. She ruffled her short, fluffy pink hair. 

Was this it? Was this all she could ever hope to expect? She’s a Diamond. She’s just as important as White, Yellow, and Blue. It was downright cruel that she’d been treated like some fragile glass statue ever since her emergence and continued to be treated as such. Like an object - only interacted with when convenient.

She wasn’t lying to White when she had said she loved Blue. She did. She loved Blue and Yellow and her fellow gems. If Blue and Yellow truly felt they were on equal footing with her, they would listen to her - really listen to her. They’d show honest 100% concern the first time she’d attempted to explain what White had done to her - how White made her feel. Nothing. A few words of affirmation and that was it. No one was doing anything and it infuriated Pink. None of this was what she wanted or needed. 

She clawed at her hair in frustration, feeling tears threatening to fall from her eyes. She couldn’t let them fall, though. Not a single salty drop. Never in all her future eons would she let them. Though she didn’t technically need it, she took a deep breath and released it. It did help alleviate some of the painful prickling at the center of her gem.

A bit of color returned to her surroundings, but not much - only the dulled yellows and pinks. She felt herself calming down little by little. Good. As much as she loathed White, she had to keep playing this game with a level head until she could escape.

Soon, she’d have her colony. She’d have a heaven all to herself. No White. No Blue or Yellow. No feeling like she wasn’t a Diamond at all and that she could never hope to be.

Pink clutched her hands at her sides with her resolve. 

A small part of her wished she’d never asked that question. If she’d only have kept her mouth shut, she’d be oblivious - oblivious to White’s true nature and to how Blue and Yellow were simply uncompelled to take action. She’d at least still have the illusion that she was being heard and being treated right.

Then again, she supposed the realization was bound to reveal itself at one point or another down the road. In a way, she was glad she found out when she was this young. It assured her that this was the true reality - that this was what she needed to see and overcome if she ever wished to be free.

The best Diamond she could be…

She’d get her colony and prove that she was equal to the rest of them. Anything to rid herself of this icy dread. Anything to make it go away for the rest of eternity. 

Anything.

**Author's Note:**

> A small piece in between working on my Avengers fic. I wanted to explore White's abusivness towards Pink. Thoughts?


End file.
